今天北京下了今年冬天的第一场雪。一早起来就看到外面白茫茫的，匆匆忙忙的出去见一个工作上的contact. 车已经变成了一座白色的小山，我的车上还没来得及备雪刷，就只好把一朋友送的除味碳的袋子用来“扫”车上的雪。

好久没有在雪里开车了，说时话在北京这两年也没太见过这么大的雪，只记得两年前的11月刚回来时，北京阴阴的、冷冷的，地铁上的人一脸疲惫，在这个浮躁的社会里挣扎。

现在看到一大片一大片的飘下来，周围都变成白色的世界，看上去很干净，也让我心情很好。开着车，大片大片的雪好像扑面而来，有一点以前在北达的感觉。记得当时，人家当地人都特别会在冰雪中开车，只有我常常控制不了车。还记得第一年到北达的时候当地的同事在一次吃饭时围着我讲了很多冬天在路上的恐怖故事，告诉我车里要备雪锹、沙袋、毛毯等等一系列的东西，以防开长途时遇到暴风雪。当时听的我蛮害怕的，但还是很懒，在那边住了两年也没有准备这些东西。现在全球变暖，到处天气都怪怪的，也不知道冬天应该做些什么样的准备。

下午在外面办事，居然看到一个叫秋林的店。因为除了在哈尔滨有个著名的秋林公司，我在其他城市没有见过叫秋林的店，所以用手机在外面拍了张照，然后好奇的走进去。食品店还没有开张，里面的工作人员好像在开会，看我推门进去，很吃惊。他们告诉我该店月底开张，将卖俄式食品，比如大列巴等等。食品店离我新家不远，将来可以很容易的吃到在家乡时吃的东西了。：）

我对秋林这个词并不了解，于是回家后上网搜了一下，原来它是俄国的一个商人的姓，秋林公司就是他在哈尔滨开的，有100多年的历史。


北京秋林－Churin food store in Beijing


哈尔滨秋林公司（新华图片） － Harbin Churin (Xinhua photo)

欢快的节奏足以在上班的路上唤醒我。呵呵。

时光

歌手:许巍 

在阳光温暖的春天／走在这城市的人群中／在不知不觉的一瞬间／又想起你／你是记忆中最美的春天／是我难以再回去的昨天／你像鲜花那样地绽放／让我心动

在阳光温暖的春天／走在这城市的人群中／在不知不觉的一瞬间／又想起你／也许就在这一瞬间／你的笑容依然如晚霞般／在川流不息的时光中 神采飞扬

从未喜欢过郑智化的歌，可是听姐姐唱起这首《别哭，我最爱的人》，听着她温柔的声音，觉得很好听，于是在网上找来歌词。

今天起床后，就自己做家务，还有很多很多要做的，但感觉这种安安静静的状态很好。最近几个月总是那么忙碌，那么无序，那么没有方向。现在终于知道是好好工作、好好生活的时候了，就好像一个阶段结束，一个新的阶段开始了。

别哭,我最爱的人 
今夜我如昙花绽放 
在最美的一刹那凋落 
你的泪也挽不回的枯萎 
别哭,我最爱的人 
可知我将不会再醒 
在最美的夜空中眨眼 
我的眸是最闪亮的星光 
是否记得我骄傲地说 
这世界我曾经来过 
不要告诉我永恒是什么 
我在最灿烂的瞬间毁灭 
不要告诉我成熟是什么 
我在刚开始的瞬间结束

在美国的时候，有很多朋友无法忍受Christmas songs，尤其不喜欢这些歌一开始播放就代表让人受不了的购物阶段开始了。我不喜欢购物，但对大多数Christmas songs都并不介意，相反，我觉得有些很好玩。比如下面这首：

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KCpNeHgeyo4

又要到圣诞节了，这个节日一般是要和家人度过的，可我每次想起圣诞节，想到的总是不止家人－－还有那些象家人一样的好友和关心过我、帮助过我的朋友。

今天休假，晚上却在家里做了一件我平时觉得最无聊的事－－发email. 我通常觉得emailing太浪费时间，但今天却很情愿的付出时间， 因为很多朋友都已经因为工作忙、生活忙而很久没有联系。有的时候想想，不由的责怪自己给朋友的时间太少，很多精力时间可能浪费在不应该的人和事上了。

不管怎么说，还是想在这里祝朋友们圣诞快乐，无论你是否过圣诞节，希望你知道有人祝福你。

最近又买了许巍的《在别处》，听了半天只有一两首喜欢的歌，但却觉得这张 CD 更象许巍、更摇滚、更少修饰、更真实。

他的那手《执着》，怎么谱曲、填词、唱得那么好啊？和田震唱的比较了一下，觉得都好听！


执着

作曲：许巍 作词：许巍
　 （歌词转自 音魁网 www.inkui.com）
每个夜晚来临的时候
孤独总在我左右
每个黄昏心跳的等候
转 是你无限的温柔
每次面对你的时候
不敢看你的双眸
在你温柔的笑容背后
有多少泪水哀愁
不管时空怎样转变
世界怎么改变
你的爱总在我心间
你是否明白
我想超越这平凡的生活
注定现在暂时漂泊
无法停止我内心的狂热
未来的执着
拥抱着你
Oh My Baby
我看到你在流泪
是否爱我让你伤悲，让你心碎
拥抱着你
Oh My Baby
可你知道我无法后退
纵然是我苍白憔悴
伤痕累累

五月过得有点乱糟糟的。先是让人揪心的地震，让我无语，不知道自己能做点什么。接着，就是繁忙的工作、生活，做不完的事，烦不完的心。

现在在一点点地清理思路，前进的步伐很小很小。

端午节，陪父母去了中国美术馆，在展出一些德国艺术家的油画，花了几个小时，一幅幅地看，让我想起过去在美国利用闲暇时间逛博物馆的样子，觉得很放松。主要参展作家有Casper David Friedrich和Gerhard Richter，我虽然不懂油画，但却很欣赏二位作家的作品，父母也很enjoy这个展出。遗憾的是，美术馆为了这次德国作品展出，居然撤掉了自己的固定展出，而且也许是为了迎奥运，有很多工程在开展，5层楼只有两层开放，又没有设置很好的路标和隔离带子以方便游客。前台的服务人员也是爱理 不理的。

看完了画展，我们溜达着到了王府井，途经四合院等比较旧的北京建筑，看到了在街上理发的、在公园里打扑克的、和象我们这样在街上看光景的。太阳晒在身上暖洋洋的，突然感觉到和写字楼、拥挤的地铁、永不中止的冷酷面孔完全相反的一种气息。于是突然很满足、很放松。... ...

＊ Haven't written much lately, as life has been crap.

Well actually, not completely true, but there hasn't been a lot going on in my life. I also feel like I'm entering a different stage of my relocation now -- the stage where I really miss my friends in the U.S., the stage when I want to flee. (I guess the other stages include dealing with the bad air, trying to get used to the way people do things here, trying to navigate through the health care system, etc. etc.)

A series things that happened also seem to make this the lowest moment since I moved back. Among them, I've been hit again and again with some sort of cold or flu, which has become inconvenient, annoying and somewhat frightening. "Is there something seriously wrong with me?" I ask myself. "My last checkup was OK."

＊ There has been a few good things, among them my Spanish class. It's been going on for about a month now, and I love, love, love it. I don't know what it is, but being in a language class is just very refreshing, exciting and stimulating. It really helps me relax. For now I can say only a few sentences, but I really hope to keep working on this in the years to come.

* Went back to my hometown Harbin for my 10-year college reunion. That was actually a lot of fun, too. Saw some friends I haven't seen for 10 years, and even though everyone followed a different path and has a different life now, a lot of the personalities and friendship remain unchanged. This trip totally exceeded my expectations.

* Summer is here. Everybody's getting out their light-colored outfits. Everybody's wearing something pretty. Somehow I'm just lazy about it. Come to think about it, I'm still slowly warming up to this place.

All right. That's all the mumbling I'm going to do for now. I'd be bored reading this myself. ... Promised to post new photos, but still don't have any good scenery shots.

I saw a live acrobatic show for the first time in my life tonight. It's not something I would normally seek to do, as I more or less associate it with the circus and always feel that the moves are achieved through great physical pain. But tonight I went with a friend from the U.S. and a couple of his friends, just trying to be a good host (he was one of the participants at one of the programs I managed during my nonprofit time, and came to Beijing for a semester. We've been trying to meet up for a few months, but being the negligent friend I am, we didn't get the chance until tonight.).

I was surprised to find that I actually enjoyed the show a lot. There was nothing in the show that I haven't seen on TV: 10 people on one moving bike, people jumping through hoops of various heights, people stacked on each other, people catching high flying objects with their heads, some degrees of contortion, etc. etc. But the show becomes much more enjoyable when you are surrounded by people who are really into it. You clap together, wow together, and worry about whether the eight plates the girl is spinning might fall off or the third person being sprung into the air will be able to get steady footing on the second person's head.

I was amazed what the members of the troop was able to do. And this may sound lame and weird (because I've been so critical of China on this blog), but sitting there, among all the people who appreciated the show (half the audience was people from other countries and most of the rest were in Chinese tour groups), I felt proud as a Chinese.

下午，电话铃声响起，是个奇怪的号码。以为是林子里的朋友，但昨晚刚通过话。

接听中，听出居然是刚回国时在代英语课时教过的学生，当时几个人的公司把他们送到北京进行一个月的专职英语培训，为去澳大利亚进
一步进修做准备。记得一个月当中学生很努力学习，问了很多关于在国外生活、交流的问题，英语进步很快。我到现在还记得自己震惊的发现（确切的说是这些学生让我回忆起中国的学生对老师表现得多么的尊重），因为我本身作为被聘用的老师，感觉学生是我的客户，只是想尽我所能，把课上好，针对学生的需要，帮他们准备出国。

想不到，短短的一个月过后，有那么一两个学生保持了联系。更想不到，会接到一名学生从澳洲打来的电话。听起来他们在那边一个月来适应得很好。非常enjoy当地的优美环境、学校里和世界各国去进修的学生的接触、和当地的host family的融洽相处。电话中洋溢着excitement. 让我不禁想起自己第一次
出国的情形。深深地祝福这些学生，这一年里在澳洲一切顺利、学业有成！

＊长周末，妈妈过生日，好像这几周来才有机会去见妈妈，也难得有和两位姐姐同时见面的机会。想不到北京，是如此的大、如此的忙，和家人、朋友同处一城市，却很难有机会见面，一整天也好像只能办一件事。

＊《我叫金三顺》真的很好看。早就有几个让人信赖的人推荐，但一直到这周末才有机会看。Funny, sweet,short ...真是周末消遣的好电视。我看得天昏地暗，昨晚和前天晚上熬了夜，今天起床就嗓子疼，结果今天在家一天看了8集，感觉现在眼睛要瞎了。明天还要早起。

终于加入了一家健身房，于是决定昨天去上一节瑜伽课。有朋友告诉我说，做瑜伽要去专业的瑜伽馆，但我只是想活动活动
腿脚，对瑜伽课没有那么高的要求，就去了健身房。

教课的老师很漂亮，每个动作好像也很到位，可是一堂课过后，还是觉得有点不适应。

老师经常会在做某个动作的时候，告诉大家这动作可以瘦腰、或收腹、或提臀。我对瑜伽了解很少，总觉得作瑜伽是为了健康、放松、修身养性之类的，听到这么罗罗嗦嗦的对美容效应的讲解，感觉怪怪的。

老师好像也蛮严格的。中间有一个动作我做不出来，就停下来了，老师带者责怪的口吻说，怎么不做了？我说，柔韧性不好，做不了这个动作。她立刻批评：就是柔韧性不好才要练嘛！

另一个动作，老师要求把膝盖放在耳朵两侧，有一个学生的动作不一样，老师竟然大声的说了3遍， 你听到我说的话了吗？ 并走到该学生面前，责令，别做了，
做的不好会受伤的。

希望她是救了那个学生一命，否则我会感觉从来没见过这么不平和的瑜伽老师，好像脾气比我还不如。

It's that time of the year, again, and I just want to say "Happy Thanksgiving!" to my friends who celebrate this holiday.

Thanksgiving is my favorite American holiday. It falls on the fourth Thursday of November, which is tomorrow this year. The holiday was started in 1621 by the Pilgrims who moved to the U.S. from Europe in 1620 and survived a hard first year with the help of the American Indians who lived there. Today, Thanksgiving is an important American holiday, during which families get together.

I love Thanksgiving partly because of the delicious food I get to eat during this holiday: turkey with gravy, mashed potato (or cooked any other way), yams, cranberries, pumpkin pies (and all kinds of other pies), etc., etc. ... It's also one of the few times during the year when all family members get together and enjoy some relaxing time. Even families that do not normally cook would cook on this day, and people going home would often bring some food, too.

Oddly enough, as I'm sitting here typing this piece, I'm feeling like a kid away from home. I'm feeling a little "homesick." I'm used to this time of the year being festive, being relaxing, being a time when I visit with friends, and Beijing feels so "quiet" now because nobody here celebrates Thanksgiving. (Well, the American expat community is probably celebrating, but I obviously don't belong.)

Nonetheless, I want to take this opportunity to express my thanks, my thanks to family and friends for all their help and support all these years, my thanks to all who invited me into their homes during this holiday in the past nine years (at least two of those years, I had two dinners per Thanksgiving, just because of the kindness and warmth of people), my thanks for having this life in general and for having the experience I've had.

A few particularly memorable Thanksgivings:

1998. My first Thanksgiving in the U.S. My friend JW invited me to go with him and his wife to his in-laws for the holiday. It was my first trip by car from Reno across the Sierra Nevada Mountains to California, and JW's wife insisted that I sit in the front passenger seat -- just so I get a better view. The whole trip, she introduced me the places we drove past and their history. From that moment, I felt like she was a big sister to me.

2004. A working holiday. I was sent to northwestern Wisconsin to cover the first of six funerals of a group of hunters killed by a man of Southeast Asian decent. Tough luck for me because the funeral home which said it would allow us in to interview family and friends during the viewing the night before the funeral ended up not letting any reporters in. I stood outside, in the dark, in the snow for more than an hour to get quotes from people. Most people were very hostile to me (I could understand), but one of the late hunter's friends ended up opening up and brought over more friends to talk about the hunter and his life.

2005. My worst Thanksgiving. Following months of chemo, I had my surgery the Monday of Thanksgiving week. I was physically and mentally unfit to attend any Thanksgiving dinner, but my sister ended up dragging me out for a beer so that I didn't spend all my time moping at home.

2006. Putting on the apron. I hosted my own Thanksgiving dinner in Connecticut, and had some friends over. It was big for me because -- I hardly ever cooked. It took me a couple of days of recipe searching and shopping for ingredients to make a presentable Thanksgiving dinner. :)

今天什么也没干，在姐姐家呆了整整一天。好像主要活动也就是两顿饭、和给姐姐看了看我最近一个月在外面疯跑的照片。

本来我觉得自己挺勤奋的。：）在外面疯玩了一个月，很累，但觉得怎么也应该赶快想办法工作了，觉得如果不工作会感觉很内疚，哪怕先做 parttime 也好。但这两天下来，发现闲着的感觉也没那么坏，不用早起，有时间吃早饭，还可以上网、和父母吃吃饭、听听音乐、看点书什么的。

... ...
姐姐对我真好，不但管饭，还给我带些吃的回来。又把我当小孩了。