Life Is Beautiful

家实在是该打扫了。连着两周出差，虽然家里没怎么用，但回家看看，总是觉得很脏。打了一圈电话，所有的家政公司都说小时工都已经回家了，也是，谁晚上七点多等我这点活啊。站在洗手间里，发了半天愣，犹豫自己打扫，还是再忍两天。最后还是放弃了流汗。

才意识到，我这么长时间没有写博客了，而且更久没有写过一篇好的。好像最近有点忙，但又好像没干什么。以前那么喜欢在外面跑的我（作记者的时候，有一次老板奖励性的让我挑一个报道方向，我想了想，申请了一个新的方向－－regional，因为可以开着车几个小时在路上去边远的地方采访，欣赏路边的田园景色，认识淳朴的rural America）。现在也很喜欢在出差的时候认识新的人、接触新鲜的事物，但是总是下意识的用批判的眼光去衡量这些城市，总在想，北京也很多不满意的地方，但我宁可住北京。

也许是因为和别的城市的对比，也许是别的原因，我渐渐习惯了北京。I think I’m warming up to this city. Every time when I was flying back to Beijing after a business trip, I felt like I was going home, to my own nest, that is. Last week, when the plane was landing in Beijing, for a moment it felt like I was landing in the U.S. – not because the ground looks similar, but because of the anticipation after a long journey that soon I would be back in my own place, taking a shower and relaxing.

Today, coming home to Beijing was even somewhat exciting – because of the Olympics. I was never crazy about all the preparation, all the sacrifices the people in Beijing had to go through for the Olympics – the extra, extra security checks everywhere, the canceled wet markets and furniture deliveries, the endless time- and money-consuming torch relays, the over-played songs such as “we are ready” (Hearing the song always makes me feel we are a nation with a big inferiority complex).

But today, with the opening ceremony only two days away, I’m looking forward to it. It just feels like a final product is coming out after years’ of work and anticipating, regardless of the controversies and the negativity from time to time. Now, it’s more like -- a pregnant mother is finally going to deliver her baby. So, I want to say, best wishes to the Beijing Olympics.

最近又买了许巍的《在别处》，听了半天只有一两首喜欢的歌，但却觉得这张 CD 更象许巍、更摇滚、更少修饰、更真实。

他的那手《执着》，怎么谱曲、填词、唱得那么好啊？和田震唱的比较了一下，觉得都好听！


执着

作曲：许巍 作词：许巍
　 （歌词转自 音魁网 www.inkui.com）
每个夜晚来临的时候
孤独总在我左右
每个黄昏心跳的等候
转 是你无限的温柔
每次面对你的时候
不敢看你的双眸
在你温柔的笑容背后
有多少泪水哀愁
不管时空怎样转变
世界怎么改变
你的爱总在我心间
你是否明白
我想超越这平凡的生活
注定现在暂时漂泊
无法停止我内心的狂热
未来的执着
拥抱着你
Oh My Baby
我看到你在流泪
是否爱我让你伤悲，让你心碎
拥抱着你
Oh My Baby
可你知道我无法后退
纵然是我苍白憔悴
伤痕累累

五月过得有点乱糟糟的。先是让人揪心的地震，让我无语，不知道自己能做点什么。接着，就是繁忙的工作、生活，做不完的事，烦不完的心。

现在在一点点地清理思路，前进的步伐很小很小。

端午节，陪父母去了中国美术馆，在展出一些德国艺术家的油画，花了几个小时，一幅幅地看，让我想起过去在美国利用闲暇时间逛博物馆的样子，觉得很放松。主要参展作家有Casper David Friedrich和Gerhard Richter，我虽然不懂油画，但却很欣赏二位作家的作品，父母也很enjoy这个展出。遗憾的是，美术馆为了这次德国作品展出，居然撤掉了自己的固定展出，而且也许是为了迎奥运，有很多工程在开展，5层楼只有两层开放，又没有设置很好的路标和隔离带子以方便游客。前台的服务人员也是爱理 不理的。

看完了画展，我们溜达着到了王府井，途经四合院等比较旧的北京建筑，看到了在街上理发的、在公园里打扑克的、和象我们这样在街上看光景的。太阳晒在身上暖洋洋的，突然感觉到和写字楼、拥挤的地铁、永不中止的冷酷面孔完全相反的一种气息。于是突然很满足、很放松。... ...

The other day, I met up with a Yale student who participated in one of the programs I used to manage. I asked him what he was doing in the past few months as an exchange student at PKU, besides going to class. He told me he had been volunteering at a migrant school 2.5 hours away from Beida every week. He would take the subway for 2.5 hours to the school on the outskirts of Beijing, teach English to fourth, fifth and sixth graders for three hours and then travel 2.5 hours back to Beida for his Chinese class. The volunteer work basically makes up an eight-hour work day.

He puts me to shame. I've been saying I want to volunteer in the public health field since I moved back in November. Six months later, I haven't even got started. And there's the American student, who didn't even speak mandarin when he first got here in February. And right away, he hit the ground running.

One Chinese woman once told me that when she's made enough money, she'll start volunteering. Her income level is upper middle-class. There are many people like her, who feel that they haven't done enough to even take care of themselves. And there are others, who, like me, use the lack of spare time as an excuse. But the thing is, none of the people who are making these excuses (including me) are having a difficult life. In fact, we are living comfortably. Yet we can't find the time to spare for people in need or for a cause we believe in.

I believe the Chinese people, who are traditionally known for their hospitality, politeness and generosity, need to form the habit of volunteering. Not everybody need to do what the college student has been doing and give up a whole day every week to volunteer. If you could spare a couple of hours every other week, or even just a couple of hours every month, your time could be helpful to somebody or some project. Who can say we can't even spare two hours every month? That's one dinner with some friends.

在美国很多人搬到一个新城市后都会找在该社区作志愿者的机会。 有些人通过教会，有些人通过一些自己信任的组织。大家会找一些自己喜欢或擅长的事做，比如喜欢户外活动的会去进行一些公园、野外小径的清理、维护，喜欢历史的人会去当地的艺术馆、博物馆做解说，喜欢小孩的人会帮忙组织一些课余活动给低收入家庭的小孩，等等。人们既做了对社会和他人有用的事，同时也是在做自己感兴趣的事。

＊ Haven't written much lately, as life has been crap.

Well actually, not completely true, but there hasn't been a lot going on in my life. I also feel like I'm entering a different stage of my relocation now -- the stage where I really miss my friends in the U.S., the stage when I want to flee. (I guess the other stages include dealing with the bad air, trying to get used to the way people do things here, trying to navigate through the health care system, etc. etc.)

A series things that happened also seem to make this the lowest moment since I moved back. Among them, I've been hit again and again with some sort of cold or flu, which has become inconvenient, annoying and somewhat frightening. "Is there something seriously wrong with me?" I ask myself. "My last checkup was OK."

＊ There has been a few good things, among them my Spanish class. It's been going on for about a month now, and I love, love, love it. I don't know what it is, but being in a language class is just very refreshing, exciting and stimulating. It really helps me relax. For now I can say only a few sentences, but I really hope to keep working on this in the years to come.

* Went back to my hometown Harbin for my 10-year college reunion. That was actually a lot of fun, too. Saw some friends I haven't seen for 10 years, and even though everyone followed a different path and has a different life now, a lot of the personalities and friendship remain unchanged. This trip totally exceeded my expectations.

* Summer is here. Everybody's getting out their light-colored outfits. Everybody's wearing something pretty. Somehow I'm just lazy about it. Come to think about it, I'm still slowly warming up to this place.

All right. That's all the mumbling I'm going to do for now. I'd be bored reading this myself. ... Promised to post new photos, but still don't have any good scenery shots.